Well, it's T-minus one hour until I head over to the university. I've gone through pretty much every emotion from "Why was I stupid enough to sign up for this??" to "I should be doing this with my entire life!" But, as a good friend pointed out, that would only add to the problem because then I would be, well, homeless.
I finally managed to get my hands on a sleeping bag and pillow so I'm actually starting to feel prepared. I'm most looking forward to having the time in the evening to just exist, electronics free, and get to know my fellow teammates. I'm least looking forward to a) the cold, sleepless nights and b) people's reactions. For the most part, I've gotten really positive support when I've told people about this, but I also know in the past they've been ridiculed and mocked. I'm torn; I am a people pleaser and have a desperate need to have everyone approve of me, but I also really care about this project and am willing to make people uncomfortable if it means supporting a great cause. I know it's not about what people think, so this week will be a very tangible opportunity for me to come to terms with that. It will be humbling and frustrating, but an important experience. I'm excited and nervous and ready. As my mom quoted to me this morning:
I don't want to just be changed, I want to be change.
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